i wrote these words for my dear sister hayley dawn in august. rather than share them with her right away, i thought i would wait for the appropriate time. that time came unexpectedly this past week, at her bedside, with much tears.
hayley dawn, i love you with all my heart, and i know you are now dancing in His presence. i know you are now home.
you’re not likely to read this any time soon, but my heart is heavy this morning with words i feel He wants you to know. so, my hope, as i put these thoughts to words, is that you may someday read them. and on that day, the day He has already ordained, i hope He will use these words to speak directly to your heart.
i feel like He wants to tell you He’s sorry. He’s sorry that things aren’t more clear for you now. He’s sorry it’s not easier to see how much He loves you. how overwhelming His love is for you, and how He has done more than you will ever know to show you that.
He’s sorry for the pain you’re going through now. but, more importantly, He wants you to know that your pain pales in comparison to the pain He feels for you. and that pain, His pain, pales in comparison to the love He has for you.
from a step to a sprint
He wants you to know that He has done everything to make it better. He wants you to know that He has paid the highest price to make a path from your feet to Himself. He wants you to know that He is cheering you on every single day, that you would take one step in faith toward Him. and one more tomorrow. and another the next day. and He looks forward to the day when those small steps will turn into a brisk walk. and from a brisk walk to a jog. and finally from a jog into a full on sprint into His outstretched arms.
He wants you to know that His desire is for your heart, and that you would joyfully hand it over to Him. and you would, if only you could see, clearly, how deep His love is for you. how much deeper it is than any other love you have ever known.
He wants you to know how He longs to hold you in His arms. and someday He will.
your return home
even though that day is so distant that you can’t see it now, He can. and He is looking forward to that day with great excitement and anticipation. excitement to celebrate your return home.